Have you ever felt like a character in a scifi movie, the unsuspecting schlep who first encounters the mutant plant and then is devoured by it before it goes on to conquer the world?

I felt like that guy this morning when I realized that there was a whole new layer of growth coming up through the huge patch of DSV I had zapped three weeks ago.

Dog strangling vine spreads more rapidly than anything I have seen before. Its rate of growth is hard to believe, and it is relentless. Roundup will kill it, but it’s a lot like creeping charlie, the weed which bedeviled my mother’s gardening days: break it up or cut it off and any bit of root or stem will simply produce another plant.

But DSV also produces pods which rather resemble small green beans. They dry and release milkweed-style seeds on parachutes, and there are millions of these pods on the plants. DSV also climbs with alacrity, wrapping itself around other vines to produce the “dog strangling” effect after which it is named.

On my first attempt to walk through a metre-high mass of this stuff I nearly pulled both hamstrings.

This week I have seen outcroppings of the weed along the Ferry Road near Chaffey’s Locks, the Chaffey’s Locks Road, and Lockwood Lane. On my friend’s building lot it has made it 150 feet in under the forest canopy in one area. On the other side of the road it seems to be progressing unhindered.

If we don’t take immediate measures to control this invader, we can forget about plant diversity and seedling growth in our woodlots. DSV will crowd everything out. We can also forget about walking through forest trails in summer and fall.

By comparison the wild parsnip which lines our roads is a mild irritant. The DSV is a crisis and we need to take immediate steps to fight it back.

Municipal governments must get on the ball. This stuff is vectoring down roadways, quite possibly spread by mowing. Spraying to control the infestation is the logical first step. But it must be done immediately.

In Ogdensburg at the TSC, Roundup and other concentrated herbicides are on the shelf for anyone to buy, but to obtain the same materials in Ontario you must write the pesticides examination every five years. Many tree-huggers, myself included, now hold expired licenses, and our life supplies of Roundup (purchased before our licenses expired) won’t last through a blight on the landscape like this.

The second step would be to facilitate the acquisition of pesticides licenses and renewals: a single exam in Perth in mid-March will do no good for land owners who wish to protect their property this summer. And they’ll need the restricted stuff if they want to do any good. So far in three sessions I have sprayed 6 litres of concentrate (diluted 100 to 1) on one infected building lot, and it will take more to do the job. The diluted stuff in hardware stores available without a license just won’t cut it.

We need to get serious. If a brush fire were blazing at the front of your property, you’d try to put it out, right? DSV will easily have as devastating an effect as a forest fire on your property if it is allowed to spread unchecked.

Once those seed pods dry out and split, the time for action will have passed, and we can forget about walking through the woods.

UPDATE:  August 14, 2014

My neighbour dropped a clipping from Tuesday’s Citizen by the house.  It’s an interview with Dr. Naomi Cappuccino of the biology department at Carleton University.  Her specialty is biological controls of invasive speces.  She claims to have located a moth which eats only DSV. 

PressDisplay.com – Ottawa Citizen – 12 Aug 2014 – The tale of the moth and nasty plant

http://www.uri.edu/news/releases/?id=6791

Wayne Bennett, owner of Bennett’s Bait N’ Tackle, set me up with the rod himself. He said the choice between a short trolling rod and a long one was a matter of convenience in the boat rather than flex. He sold me a sturdy, short rod designed for lead-core line and my awkward Daiwa line-counter reel.

My success at downrigging for splake had diminished to nothing over the last few years, but my pal Tony has done well on Indian Lake with the much quieter lead-core line. The new rod was an attempt to improve my deep-water success with a fresh try at this old technique.

It was blowing pretty hard Friday evening, but I bashed through the chop across Newboro and Clear Lakes, coasted through the Isthmus and found the relative calm of the south shore of Indian, near Chaffey’s Locks. At first I dragged the lure around behind the Merc 35, running into the breeze to keep the speed down. Nothing. Approaching the spot where I had caught a splake the weekend before, I decided to use the electric motor again. Quiet and slow was worth a try.

One afternoon a few years ago I happened upon a tight school of 12” splake, most likely just dumped in from a hatchery. It was great fun catching and releasing the naïve fish, but they were much harder to hook than you might think. The trouble was they kept ripping my little tube jigs apart without getting hooked. After a while I realized that on a typical strike, a splake swims up quickly from behind, then with the tip of its mouth it grabs the trailing “fin” of the lure and tries to tear it off. An instant of hesitation with a slack line greatly increased my hook-set efficiency.

On a whim I added a stinger hook with a small tube jig to the treble on the silver spoon.

The line was no sooner down to 75 feet than I felt an unmistakable strike, and this time the fish had hung on to one or the other of the hooks. This was a strong fish. With 200 feet of lead-core line out behind the stiff, awkward rod, sensations were pretty vague. Truth be known I spent most of the time on that first retrieve trying to find a way to hold the rod. The butt was too long. It didn’t fit anywhere. Eventually I straddled the thing and cranked.

The fish came clanking in. I don’t quite know how the fish created that rattling sensation. It must have something to do with the metal line. Or maybe it was my heart racing.

Now I have landed a lot of fish in the last fifty years, so I’m fairly confident about bringing one up to the boat. Normally. This time I wasn’t. Trouble was I had a heavy splake on a very stiff, short rod. Normally I keep the rod tip up and rely on its spring to absorb the shock when the fish sees the boat and decides to leave.

My best bass rod is so good at this that I can just hang on and let the rod wear the fish out. But it cost three hundred dollars. The one Wayne had just sold me ran twenty-eight. I couldn’t count on this stick to play my fish for me, so I loosened the reel’s drag to compensate.

The 16 pound monofilament leader was about twelve feet long. This caused part of the problem because every time the end of the leader would come out of the water, I kept disengaging the reel, allowing it to free-spool against my thumb. I worried that the fish would run, overpower the drag, and break off.

I did get a couple of good looks at the splake, a very large, slow-moving specimen as it crossed under the boat. On one pass it also provided an excellent view of its lunch, scattered through the clear water.

Brought up from 75 feet, a lake trout would be pretty well finished from the pressure change, but not a splake. This fish was just starting to realize that it was in a serious fight, and somehow I kept hoping to ambush it with my little bass net. It was way too big for that net, but I clutched it anyway. In retrospect I guess I wasn’t thinking all that clearly. With two hands on the rod I might not have failed to prevent the stiff lead line from a backlash the next time the fish bolted. As soon as the lead-core kinked, the leader snapped and I numbly reeled in my empty line. That’s how fish get to be big.

I’ve got to get a bigger net. I need to learn to trust the drag on that damned reel and not release the clutch — under any conditions — while playing a fish. A big splake isn’t going to let me tow it up to the boat like a bass. I’ll have to tire it out first.

That splake was big. Two days later when I whined to Opinicon guide Lennie Pyne about the lost fish, he smiled and told me that the largest splake caught last year out of Indian Lake weighed over 16 pounds.

And as a boy I loved it.
The clear blue sky
Reflected in the shining surface
Of the lakes –
The old stone house,
Resplendent on the hill,
Our home.

It has been my pleasure recently to read Don Warren’s new book, The House on the Hill:  Recollections of a Rideau Canal Lockmaster’s son.  (Trafford, 2008).

The first section consists of Don’s memories from the twenties up to World War II.  The second is a sanitized version of his military experiences, and the volume concludes with a collection of poems he has written over the years.

The Lockmaster’s House at Chaffey’s Locks is very much at the centre of this book. At the end of a long wagon ride from Newboro in his seventh year, Don took one look at the big house on the hill and fell in love with it, ghosts and all.  As he gives a lively account of the exploration of his new home, I kept checking back to the photographs he included in the volume.  I hadn’t known about the footbridge across the spillway to the rear entrance of the Mill.  I wish I could have seen the eels tumbling through the current on their way to the Atlantic.

Don’s accounts of battles with Daisy the Cow and early skirmishes with Opinicon guests with sensitive noses make it evident that the young man will not turn out to be a farmer.  The campfire sing-alongs, practical jokes, outhouse mishaps and thefts from his mother’s garden provide a warm and amusing picture of life at the lockstation during the Great Depression.

Then, as now, a lockmaster must be an agent of the government.  Don recounts his father having to tell the Chaffey’s fishing guides that they could no longer camp on the property in order to make more space for visitors from the capital.  Don carries his father’s shame at this act of “democracy” to this day.

Understandably, some of the best sequences in the memoir concern fishing.  Don lists detailed instructions on the construction of a “bob” for fishing bullheads in early spring.   He offers a few tales of his guiding experiences, as well.  For the talented young fisherman largemouth bass were seldom a problem to catch, but he greatly admired the style and equipment of the wealthy clients who came to fish for them.

Don’s remarkably modest throughout the book, and this no doubt takes away from the military saga, Guys in Gaiters.  Like many who have signed the official secrets act, Don explained to me that he preferred to concentrate on the army hi-jinks rather than explain what he was actually doing outside Antwerp during the later stages of the war.  “If it seems as though I had a four-year vacation in Europe during the war, I guess that’s a chance I have to take, but I did get shot at four times during that interval.”

Not much detail of the action sneaks into his account, though one paragraph does mention being left behind at Ardenes, Holland as the Allied forces pulled back to avoid a full-on German attack.  Don explained, “What happened was that four or five of us were left behind to warn of any enemy attack by tanks.  The trouble was that they had to be within 3000 yards for us to intercept their wireless signals.  This meant we had to be left far behind the rest of our unit.”

A member of the 3 Canadian Special Service Company, Don trained in signals interception on the Isle of Man.  One paragraph mentions Don’s crew’s discovery of a coded German radio message which went out immediately before the firing of every V2 rocket.  This insight created quite a stir in intelligence circles because it provided the people of England with an early warning of each V2 attack. This reduced the threat of Hitler’s terror weapon.

But the best part of the book is the poetry.  Don presents a great variety of rhymes, ranging from the ribald antics of The Ballad of Peter Milan, to the timeless portrait Woman of War. But Don won’t hold a serious mood for long, so these give way to the driving rhythms and the lively wit of Lesson for Old Age Dodgers:

So pull up those aged pants
Give old ways a different slant
Take a lesson from the youngsters in the crowd

The reader must not miss The Ballad of Senator Bill.  It deals humorously with an accusation of indecent exposure at the Narrows Lock.  Canoeists are apparently a vengeful lot, and in the ballad Don makes shrewd use of the rumour mill to deal with their tormentor.

The poem Old Age shows the hell of sitting with boxes of multi-coloured pills, blear-eyed and aching, “with conversations centering on the dying and the dead.”  Nestled between those of his children, Don Warren’s home couldn’t be further from this drear scene.  With a brave little dog watching his every move, a flock of turkeys at his window, swans on the ice below and a bevy of songbirds in his garden, Don traces with coffee cups and all-nighters his progress through the next volume of his memoirs.  He’s in his eighty-ninth year.

Donald H. Warren.  The House on the Hill:  Recollections of a Rideau Canal Lockmaster’s son.  Trafford Publishing.  2008.  ISBN:  978-1-4251-6019-7

$17.00